


Swingset

by Uru



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Murder, Murder-Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-14
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 00:38:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8555806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uru/pseuds/Uru
Summary: Levi has his hands full with a new patient full of problems.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This will not be a lighthearted fic 
> 
> I have dealt with mental health issues both personally and with relatives, there won't be an accurate description of psychiatric sessions, nor a healthy doctor-patient relationship so if that bothers you please don't read. 
> 
> see end for more notes

He wasn’t dangerous, he couldn’t understand why people insisted on saying he was a menace. Always and always, everyday shoving pills down his throat, telling him he had to for his own good, terrible liars, if he could he would hurt them, but then again that would make him a bad person which he was not. 

“Eren, you’ll feel bad if you don’t take these” the blond tried, he was nice, he didn’t mind him, he was not like the others that looked down on him with disgust. Doctor Armin pushed the small container against his hand, insisting gently “Please, for me and Mikasa, she would be so proud if she saw you taking them”. A small noise left him, agreeing, he allowed the doctor to open the container and give him two little blue pills, without waiting for water he swallowed them dry, earning a disapproval look from Armin.

He didn’t turn to look at the other man when he heard scribbling, he knew he was writing about him, if it was Armin he didn’t mind.

“Eren, you will be meeting your new psychologist soon, I want you to promise me you will be good this time” he felt warm hands cupping his own “Do you understand?”

He nodded, if Armin asked him to then he would.

 

—

 

Armin sighed, looking at his notes on the patient he had just been with. He had recently finished his degree and already dealing with such raw and hard cases, what could he even expect in his future while working at this ward.

He jumped when two arms circled around him and a squee rang in his ear, it took him a lot not to spill his coffee everywhere “Arrrrmmmiiiiinnn!!”

“D-Dr Hanji, hello” the brunette rubbed their cheeks together enthusiastically “How’s my favourite newcomer doing? visited many patients already?” she asked taking a sit besides him. The cafeteria was quiet, besides him and Hanji there were only other three people, all concentrated on papers or their laptops.

“Not many.. I was with Reiner and … And Eren” he sighed shoulders dropping, he heard a sigh leaving Hanji and her cheerfulness flattening “He was really quiet today too, didn’t look me in the eye once, he didn’t talk and I spent nearly two hours coaxing him to take his pills..”

“Well at least you managed to make him swallow them voluntarily, that’s very good Armin” she said reassuring him with a hand on his shoulder, Hanji was everything Armin could have asked for in an upperclassman, the psychologist guided him ever since day one and although her hyper personality sometimes seemed to be all over the place Armin was thankful for it, it seemed to counterbalance the gloominess of his day when he had to deal with the young patient with green eyes and shaggy hair.

“How was Reiner?” he was pulled from his thoughts looking at the person joining them, Annie sat down in front of him “Was he good? I changed his prescription last week” Armin nodded and flipped away Eren’s page on his notebook 

“He was okay, and yesterday too, he seems way less aggressive now that his been seeing you Annie” he smiled at her “I talked to him for a while and he was more articulate than usual and even talked a bit about his sessions with you!” a small smiled graced the woman’s lips as she nodded.

To them there was nothing better than seeing a patient recover, even if it was slow, and Reined was young like many other patients so seeing him get better meant he could maybe lead a normal life one day, he felt a sting in his chest, now if only Eren showed some kind of improvement as well..

“Don’t look so down Armin, you should be glad! besides we can’t heal them all at once!” Hanji said standing up, guessing what was going on on the younger doctor’s mind “now go back to your duties Armin, there’s still much to do before we get to go home” he nodded getting up, he bid Annie farewell and followed Hanji.

 

—

 

 His bed croaked as he turned, tired, always tired. A few years ago he would have been bright and happy but he just couldn’t bring himself to even try. He didn’t have many times like this, a time with a clear mind, he knew it probably wouldn’t last long. 

He covered his eyes, he could feel tears prickling at his eyes as he remembered how he had dug his fingers into the tender flesh beneath them, how the eyes that looked back at him opened wide in fear, as the mouth tried to scream in vein, he remembered it’s warmth , he remembered the commotion, the arms that gripped him, that tore him away, the marks he left on that throat and then he remembered the disappointed look on Mikasa’s face. 

He stifled a scream, covering his mouth desperately, no no no not Mikasa as well, why would she make him that face? why her too? he had done so much for her, how could she.

His wet eyes had evolved to violent sobs that shook him, no he couldn’t cry he promised Armin he would be good, he promised him he couldn’t break his promise. He knew Armin would be sad if he came and saw him like this, he had to be good, he would be good. 

His door opened, Armin had come to pick him up “I’ll be good” a smile, Armin smiled at him, Armin was good. 

 

—

 

Levi read through the file, sitting back in his leather chair, legs crossed. He looked at the name _Eren Jaeger_ , big eyes stared back, 15, German, Spanish mother Carla Jaeger ( _Deceased_ ) , German Father Grisha Jaeger ( _Deceased_ ) , Adopted sister Mikasa Ackerman.

 

Schizophrenia 

Other associated problems - Dissociative Personality Disorder

Special Caution - Patient can turn agressive, do not hesitate in restraining him during sessions if necessary. 

He read more information on the boy, he was ready for him, he had taken in all sort of fucked up shit, but a twist in his gut told him this would probably be one of the hardest cases, his eyes kept wondering to the _Age : 15_. So young, so many problems.

He reviewed the medication the boy was taking, a _tch_ making a way to his lips, so annoying some doctors simply turned him nearly as murderous as his patients, hi sigh scribbling some notes next to the _Medication_ tittle.

A knock sounded on his door, and he knew the time to meet his new patient had come. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish to be as fast updating the next chapters as I was with this one
> 
> I hope you enjoy this!

He was pleasantly surprised, usually his sessions happened in white rooms, stinking of sanitiser  but this one was different, it had couches,  furniture with books, a secretary with a laptop on it, it even had a rug and some pictures hanging. Really nice. Full of items _he could smash someone’s head with. No. no don’t do this I just got here._

He looked back at Armin, who gave him a reassuring smile “Eren, this is Dr. Ackerman, he will be your new psychiatrist from now on!” 

Eren’s eyes stopped roaming the room, _Ackerman,_ that was a nice name, it peaked his interest, Mikasa was also Ackerman and she was nice. Flashes of a disappointed face burned on the back of his brain, but he buried those quickly. He looked at the man who was supposed to be his new doctor.

Slightly shorter than him and older no doubt, he should smile, it was polite to smile, but he couldn’t bring his lips to even twitch.

“Thank you Dr. Arlert” Armin nodded and turned to the boy, taking his hands “Eren please be good, I’ll come back to pick you up in a little while ok? Dr. Ackerman will call me if anything goes wrong, alright?” Armin didn’t wait for an answer before saying goodbye and walking out, closing the door behind him.

Levi cleared his throat “Hello Eren, would you like to take a seat?” he had already guessed the boy was of few words so a lack of response did not surprise him, he didn’t press the other, he just watched as the brunette tore his gaze away from him and went back to studying the room.

Levi was proud of his office, his personalised space proved his value and how long he had been there, 6 Years working as one of the most renown doctors in Germany. Having the boy study the room was some sort of recognition of that, not that he didn’t expect him not to be surprised at his office, after all, it was completely different than the rest of the hospital.

Eren finally moved from his place, he touched some books reading their titles, feeling their spine beneath his fingers _Calm down, I must be good_ he sighed and forced himself to go sit on the empty leather couch “Hello” he mumbled, not looking that the doctor.

The younger boy brought both knees to his chest, Levi’s brain twitched in irritation as he noted those shoes upon his leather couch, but his face showed nothing of it. The doctor brushed said annoyance away as he studied Eren, the boy was thin and although he was a bit taller than Levi he looked small and frail. He had remarkable eyes and Levi was sure they certainly would look even more impressive if they weren’t cast in shadow, empty of emotion.

“Eren would you like telling me about yourself?” he asked, voice low yet soft hoping that sounding gentle would put the boy at ease. Even stirred slightly but stilled again, the only movement to be noted was the rhythmic change to his white clothes as the boy breathed. The silence would drag for nearly 5 minutes before the green eyed patient opened his mouth. 

“I am 15, I like drawing and reading” Levi noted the way Eren’s eyes flicked for a second towards his book “I like Armin and Mikasa, I like my dog Titan and… why aren’t you writing anything down?” Levi’s left eyebrow raised slightly with surprise at the amount of spite and suspicion in that question, it sounded more like _Are you going to hit me?_ or _Are you going to make fun of me?_

“Should I be taking notes during a casual conversation?” Eren still wouldn’t meet his gaze even after questioning “does it bother you that I am not writing anything down?” 

“Yes!” The boy stood up and walked towards the door, placing a hand on the handle, Levi did not move still observing, noting the way the boy’s left leg shook in a clear sign of discomfort and anxiety. Eren slowly retrieved from the door and looked at the couch _What was I doing just now?_ he groaned and went back to sit down once again pulling his knees to his chest “You’re a doctor, all doctors write down stuff when they talk to me..Even Armin.. so why aren’t you writing? why are you looking at me?”

Levi picked up his notebook and a pen and placed them in front of Eren, on the little coffee table between them “How about you try writing down while we talk? Maybe you’ll feel like I do about writing whilst talking to someone,” he said softly “Or Maybe it will even help you relax, I personally do not like writing when talking.” he offered, watching the boy who had his eyes glued to the paper and pen.

For the first time those beautiful big eyes turned to him, looking at him straight in the eye and Levi could almost swear that if he had a soul then Eren would be looking at it. 

A hand reached for the notebook on the table, the same hand touched the paper feeling its smoothness. Eren took the pen and rested the items on his lap, looking up at Levi again “Okay..”

A small victory in such a short amount of time? maybe this wouldn’t be so bad

“So Eren would you like telling me more about yourself? You said you liked drawing and reading?” he pressed sounding genuinely curious, the target of his questions had made himself busy writing down something “I used to draw a lot, I wanted to pursue art, majoring in art would have been my plan” he said while doing what it seemed to be like scribbling random shapes “I don’t have any particular favourite book or author, I like all kinds of book as long as they are well written… the last book I read was Blindness by Saramago.” 

The first thought that came to Levi’s mind was about how unexpectedly articulate Eren was, he spoke his thoughts clearly even if he sounded devoid of emotions and uninterested “Very nice, I only watched the movie, I’m sure the book is interesting as well,” he hummed resting his head on a hand “Not very common to find a boy that reads nowadays” he noted how Eren looked clearly uncomfortable after Levi spoke, was it the way he addressed the boy casually? 

“U-Uh, yeah… the book is good..” he mumbled, looking uneasy at Levi “Do you read too?” Levi’s snorted and regretted doing so seeing how it startled Eren, but he omitted said regret from his face “What do you think these books are here for? Decoration? “ 

Eren blushed _oh? unexpected_ “I-I’m sorry, yes, that’s obvious…” he said, embarassed and scratching his head while looking at the books on the shelves.

“You said you used to want to pursue Art, not anymore?” the hand that was busy scribbling halted, it was still for a bit before regaining its movements, this time in what seemed to be straight lines. 

“I can’t” the tone in Eren’s voice rang an alarm in the psychiatrist’s mind, he watched the boy carefully, “I wanted to b-but I can’t. I can’t..” Even placed the notebook in the little wood table along with the pen “I can’t, I can’t” the boy rubbed his eyes as if trying to avoid tears from spilling, he stopped taking in a big breath “W-why won’t you let me go? I’m stuck here night and day and I don’t know why!” he said, voice heavy with sadness and confusion “I haven’t done anything I’m normal!” 

Levi knew he should relax his body, he remembered that Eren’s files had annotations on how the boy reacted badly when he saw that people were tense around him or made certain expressions “Tell me Eren, do you know why I am your new Psychiatrist?” he asked, forcing himself to sit back and cross his legs, as if the person in front of him wasn’t one the verge of breaking down. 

Eren’s gaze dropped and he picked up the notebook again, resuming his scribbling, not commenting on how Levi had not answered his question _Just a talk this is just a talk_

“Dr Petra was nice” He began “but she said I wasn’t that nice, she started talking about how she didn’t understand why didn’t the medication she gave me wasn’t helping me sleep she suspected I was lying to her! Why would I lie?” he asked, anger making his way to his voice, “I …I grabbed her and that was it, she sent me away like everyone else does!” a particularly angry stroke on the notebook.

“Why did she accuse you of lying specifically?” Eren laughed, a soft sound, way too soft for the conversation’s theme “I told her that they were not helping me sleep, I told her I still heard him and she didn’t believe me! I knew some pills wouldn’t make anyone go away.” This didn’t strike Levi as the identity disorder Even had been labeled with, only schizophrenia seemed to fall into place, Even was too aware of the voice he heard as not being his own by the way he spoke of it.

And then he felt a cold shiver at the boy’s words “She looked so scared” scribbling, writing “I’m sure she couldn’t breathe” the little life in Eren’s eyes was completely gone “I pressed so hard.” he mumbled while writing more things down. Levi’s eyes narrowed, the picture’s of Petra’s heavily bruised neck present on his memory, the way her she had to write down to communicate with him when he went to visit her at the hospital because she could not speak. 

Even was transfixed in the paper beneath him stopping his scribbling when he noted that his hands were shaking, two droplets fell on the hand that was holding the pen, he was crying. Closing his eyes and stifling a sob he tried to recall good things _You’re disgusting look at you crying, are you a baby?_ he knew this was true _Maybe you need to get hurt Eren, maybe you wouldn’t be such a piece of sh-_ Warmth, there was warmth he opened his eyes and saw a hand over his, it was warm, strong yet elegant.

“It’s okay Eren” soft, so soft he looked up, eyes meeting grey ones, he swallowed a sob and nodded “I’ll be making some changed to your medication, would you like that?” Levi’s voice was like a warm hug, it hadn’t felt like that before, but now the teenager was caught in it “I need you to tell me more about how you can’t sleep and that other person”

He nodded 

 

—

 

Armin said goodbye to Eren and watched the boy make himself comfortable in his bed, the boy was quiet but different than usual. Locking the door, he made his way to the pharmacy to pick up Eren’s new medication. They would be making a slow transition as Levi had ordered. By the way that the older man had spoken about the session, he could conclude that it had gone well. When he had gone for the boy he had felt quite alarmed noting that Eren’s eyes were puffed and red from crying, but after quickly inspecting the other doctor he had concluded that the only harm done had been to Levi’s tissue box. 

He had known Even for a while, He had been his neighbours for a while before everything happened, he and Mister Jaeger used to speak in the mornings before he’d drive to college. The memory of Mikasa hitting frantically at his door, holding and unconscious Eren was still fresh in his memory even though it had already been 6 months since that fateful night. 

The hospital was quiet at this time of the day, it was nearly 6pm and most patients were already in their chambers. He greeted Annie, who was walking by with Bertolt, she encouraged the patient to greet Armin and so he did. The blond smiled at them while waving goodbye, he admired Annie, she was great with patients. Always careful and gentle with them, it almost seemed as though she had a second personality reserved for them, radically different from when she interacted with other people. 

He was quick in finishing his chores, picking up Eren’s medication, visiting a few more patients to make sure they were either taking their medication or just to check on their well being. He liked working here, he had been incredibly lucky being scouted by Hanji immediately after finishing college. He worked only as an assistant but he didn’t mind, he didn’t think he had the stomach to face some patients that were a bit more hard to deal with, in fact Eren was probably one of the few heavy cases he interacted with. 

Marco was another one of those cases, he opened the door and greeted the 19 year old. The boy had awoken one day screaming about how he had been cut in half, the hallucinations had grown worse and all about the mutilation of his body, until the day the teenager tried to kill himself and his parents decided it was time to get him checked in. He seemed in a good mood today, he had been stabilising nicely and Armin was sure that a few more months of therapy and he would be able to return home under careful supervision. 

When walking out of Marco’s room Armin noted a pill contained on the floor, he read the medication’s name and his eyes furrowed, this shouldn’t be here… Not near Marco at least. He hummed to himself studying the container, it was empty so it could have been dropped by accident. Or so he hoped. 

 

—

 

A hand swiftly took note of the day’s happenings, its owner reread files while humming a tune. He went over schedules, took note of the nearing reunions with the mental facility’s director and with other doctors. He liked leaving everything organised before going home.

He started packing his laptop and other belongings, the action coming to a halt when his hand hovered over a notebook. 

Picking it up, he could feel a tug at his lips.

 

_This one likes to talk a lot._

_Dr. Ackerman seems nice._

 

Amongst other written things and random scribbles.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this first chapter, I hope to make longer chapters in the future.
> 
> I will also try to go back to writing my other fic, my life took some turns so I stopped writing for a while.


End file.
